Bridezilla's Aren't Welcome Here

Bridezilla (n): a bride-to-be who focuses so much on the event that she becomes difficult and obnoxious; formed from the blending of the words 'bride' and 'Godzilla'.

A common term used these days for women all over the world. Heck, there's even a TV show about it. But how did it come about and why does everyone keep saying, "Wow you are so not a Bridezilla?"

I see a Bridezilla as a new breed of soon-to-wed women who abuse the idea that weddings are their 'day.' They terrorize their bridal party and family members, make greedy demands and break all rules of etiquette. They go to great lengths to ensure that they are the single most important person on the planet from the time they are engaged to the time they are married. 

So why have I decided to take the other path? Because who would want to ruin relationships and burn bridges and potentially end up on national television just to make everything about me for one day? On the same note, isn't it already a day just about me and Griff? Isn't everyone willing to do anything to make this occassion so special?

There's no need to mandate that my bridesmaids dye their hair all the same color or that Griff's groomsmen carry me into the reception (both are tacky if you ask me). There is no reason to get so upset with the cake decorator when the flowers have 6 petals instead of the ordered 8 that I knock the cake off the table (yep, saw that in an episode). It is all highly unneccesary and more dramatic than anything.

For most of them, money is no object. For others, it almost seems like the wedding is something they have to do. Some have been together for years and just expect that this is the path that they are supposed to take. Some have had shorter dating periods but are willing to spend upwards of $100,000 just so they can have the best of the best. Some get it and some don't and that's where their crazy antics come in.

They throw cakes, they tell friends they aren't allowed to be in the wedding anymore, they abuse their soon-to-be-hubby's, and they mandate the way their bridal shower/bachlorette parties are to be handled.

I even saw an article that one soon-to-be-bride ended up in jail for her stint on the show. She was seen hitting her hubby-to-be which was in direct violation of her parole. Or how about the one that bought a gun to keep hidden in her clevage because she was almost positive her ex would show up at the ceremony and try to call it all off. Crazy? I think so.

So why am I not being a Bridezilla? As I said before, I want a wedding that is a collaboration of different ideas. I want the input from family and friends. I want my day to be stress free and and not stressful. And I also want to have relationships with my friends and family after the big day.

I often wonder if I am not a Bridezilla because I am looking forward to the time after the wedding more than the time that is before the wedding. Then again, maybe it's just the type of relationship that Griff and I have; laid-back and nonchalant. We don't need lavish and expensive and we definetely aren't doing this because we feel obligated.

And I have vowed not to be a Bridezilla. It's not worth the time and effort it takes those people to get all worked up and scream and carry on. Isn't it illegal for 6 years to get married anyways?

Blast From the Past: Asking My Bridesmaids

Choosing my bridesmaids never took very much time. I always knew that my sisters would be there with me and my childhood best friends and my best friends from my college years. Realizing that I couldn't have 15 bridesmaids was made it even harder...

And then came the task of figuring out how to ask them all. I had been keeping it a secret from a few select friends, making it sound like I was only having my 4 sisters (Lauren, Lindsay, Jozee, and Baylee) but I thought it was best to keep it a surprise. I wanted to be able to tell them all in person so I needed to come up with something fast. My trip home for Christmas was going to be the perfect time to present my bridesmaids with a little something.

So I searched and searched, read blogs, and scoured websites for a cute idea for asking my bridesmaids. I wanted it to be personal...unlike my soon-to-be-husband's way of asking his groomsmen. "Hey man, I think that you're going to have to be in my wedding," were the exact words I heard come out of his mouth when asking a friend one day in the car. I was shocked but none of them seemed to bat an eye...I guess it's a guy thing.

Throughout my quest, I came upon ideas of homemade cards, decorated cookies, and even custom labels for wine bottles but none of those were my style...so I put on my thinking cap and this is what I came up with:

Each of the BMs were given a brown box tied with green ribbon (the start to my lovely color palette). Inside the box was a Ring Pop and the following poem (penned by yours truly!) on a white card:

Notice the question mark in the dress hanger? This was an inexpensive project that I think gave a little more personalization to my asking...instead of the "I guess you're going to have to be in my wedding" way.

And the final product came out just how I had imagined it...(photos to come!)

Blast from the Past: Our photographer

I was thinking about some bills that I needed to pay this morning when I was in the shower (I always seem to think my clearest there) and our photographer is one of them. Then I got to thinking about how beautiful our pictures are going to come out and I had to go and visit his site again.

Tony Spinelli will be the man of the hour when it comes to our photos and I couldn't be happier that he is going to be capturing all of our wonderful memories.

His photojournalistic style is exactly what I was looking for in a photographer. Below is a little taste of his work (and some of the photos that made me fall in love with his work):

If you have the chance, be sure to check out his website at www.tonyspinelliphotography.com. His blog is pretty awesome too!

Save the Date: Part 2

I wrote in a previous post about my Save the Date experience and I thought that I would follow up with a little look at the final product.

Thanks to Emily for the great photography! So many people have asked so I thought that I would mention that this was taken at Griff's parent's house in one of their fields. In the spot where Emily is standing taking this picture is where we were engaged on Thanksgiving weekend 2009.

It seemed easy for me to decide that this was the picture that we should use. It encompasses so much of who we are and pays homage to our Montana life.

And designing this was so unbelievably easy..and affordable! I saved an ton of money on these by using Vistaprint. I was nervous about the quality of them (I paid a few cents extra to upgrade the type of paper that they were printed on) but I couldn't have been happier about how they came out. The back is printed with the information for the hotel and travel accomodations.

More DIY projects to come!

Plan, Plan, Plan

People often tell me that my organizational skills are exceptional. Sometimes I stop myself while doing something and realize exactly how anal I am being. I am the type of person that organizes her closet by color and then goes one step further by organizing them by sleeve length.

Lately I feel like I am totally the opposite of my norm. I feel like my organization skills are going out the window...at the time when I need them the most.

It is always been my dream to be a wedding planner. Right now, my wedding is the guinea pig. Can I really do this as a profession? Can I be successful at helping people around the country planning the biggest day of their lives? I am trying my hardest to look at everything that I do and say, "How would I be approaching this part of the wedding if this was my client's big day?"

But I'm not sure if that's really something that I can do with my own wedding day. As I sit here with my mass of wedding magazines (my future husband can attest to the amount of magazines that I have acquired), my various lists, and the hundreds of pages that I have printed out, ripped out, and copied, I realize that I am allowed to have a little disarray. But I also realized that I must have a plan to help me sort through all this disorganization.

So armed with a plain sheet of paper and a pen, I got to working on my plan. Now I already have my checklist which I have mentioned before but that list helps me to stay focused on the big picture of the event. My new plan is getting down to the nitty gritty. It's writing out the way that my dessert table will look and listing the decorations that will adorn my venue. It's making suggestions to myself for my "Welcome Bags" and seriously thinking about a favor that can tie into our barn theme.

I went from being scattered brained to focusing in on specifics..and it makes me feel better; it almost pacifies me. I'm sure that these plans will change as time goes on but at least I haven't lost all confidence in my organizational skills.

That's What Friends Are For

I had a long conversation with a great friend tonight, updating her on the past couple of months; wedding planning, life in Montana, etc. We both marveled at the fact that we spent almost everyday with each other for a year and have gone months without talking.

Sad, yes...but a phone call like that is something that always amazes me. No matter how long it has been, there are people in your life that you can go long periods of time without talking to and yet, the conversation almost seems to pick up where you left off last.

And those are the types of people that we want involved in our special day.

Of course we have our bridal party who are all special to us in so many ways but we want the whole day to be a joint effort with the people that we all care for and respect the most.

Along the way, I have tried to continuously remember that as I choose the different elements of the wedding - the reception site, the ceremony, even the decorations - this is not only going to be a day to celebrate our marriage but to celebrate it alongside the people who have been there along the way.

So I was honored when my friend agreed to make the array of cupcakes that will take the place of a tradtional cake at the wedding. And what made it even more special was that she was honored as well. In time that I had known her, she was always making a themed cake for this party or for this shower and I couldn't think of anything more delectable to have at our wedding than some of her homemade confections.

Not only do I know the baker personally but she knows me pretty well too. I won't have to worry that something isn't going to look the way that I want and I definetely don't have to worry that something won't taste good (I have eaten a lot of her baked goods in the past and they are definetely tasty). And to just know that someone that is close to me has helped to make our day all that much better means so much to me.

So as we pull ideas and talk about flavors and toppings and all that good stuff, I will always be reminded that my special day wouldn't be complete without the help of so many others...after all, that's what friends (and family) are for!

7 Months/30 weeks/214 days

Today is the 7 month mark..or the 30 week mark (thanks Emily!)...or the 214 more days mark. However you look at it, time is flying.

As I sit here with my checklist happily checking off the tasks I have already completed, I seriously get to thinking about how long 7 months really is. Our engagement happened about 5 months ago and that feels like yesterday. I have lived in Montana now for 6 months and that feels like yesterday. Griff and I started dating almost a year and a half ago and that feels like yesterday.

Will 7 months fly by? Of course it will but I'm ok with that. At this point in time, I feel that my planning has come to stand still. I have a date, a venue, a church, a photographer, and a dress...but my favorite part of the planning is yet to come. The site visits (in June!) and the meetings with the vendors. Picking out the invites and getting serious (not too serious) about my centerpieces and decorations.

I have seven months to write my vows (knowing me, I'll be frantically trying to write them the week before). I have seven months to perfect my first dance skills and to come up with the perfect presents for my bridesmaids. I'm getting excited just thinking about all of the things that I still have left to do : )

Oh and I almost forgot...I have seven months to practice signing my new signature. Yes, that's going to take some getting used to so I might as well start now!